It was probably 1975. I was in 8th grade in high school. There was an exam coming up on Monday and I was clueless. I didn't know what was going to be tested or what I had to study. My sister, Jaishri asks me to contact classmates who might know but I don't have their contacts. Exasperated, she asks me to name atleast one topper in the class. I say Vanita Luthra, her parents were doctors. With this information, Jaishri took me to the neighbours house to get this girl's number from the phone directory, to contact her.
Jaishri was my gaurdian, being much older than me. She stepped into this role after my elder sister Malathy got married & left home in 1974. I had a huge problem of myopia and no glasses.. but that is a different long story. The point is I was clueless about the exam, and it had to be fixed. We did not have a phone, and our neighbours' was one of the few families in the neighbourhood that had one.
We got the number, dialed, and Jaishri asked me to speak to Vanita. But I was terrified. I had a poor opinion of myself, timid, scared of everything especially related to people & school. Aggravated with poor eyesight, life then was a big blur. So Jaishri ended up speaking to Vanita. Vanita was most helpful. Not only did she give a comprehensive idea of the exam, she even dictated her personal notes she made from her referencing in the school library. The girl was truly on top of everything. She knew it. And so willing to share. Amazing!
Jaishri gave me that glare... Look at you!!! And look at this amazing girl!!
I don't remember how I fared in the exam, but I remember Vanita telling me she enjoyed speaking to my sister. She asked if I needed more help.. and to ask her if I did. I didn't have to press for my sister's assistance she said.
I rarely initiated conversation with her or anybody for that matter in school. I was overcome with confusion and fear and could rarely make sense of what was going on.
There were flashes of brilliance though. Like when I scored 9/10 in a topic of Simple Pendulum when Vanita scored only 5. I remember she wanted to know where she lost marks and asked the teacher how marks were allocated and graded. How did she know all this? To monitor her performance? To care about tests and exams?
Vanita was sweet & kind to me. We went our separate ways after school and I heard she joined Thangam Phillip institute of cookery & hospitality in Mumbai. I was surprised at her career choice.. but never got in touch with her again.
Till a chance google search on people who influenced me, I came across this horrific article that said she jumped off the 23rd floor of a building in Versova, Mumbai in December 2018. It said she had a jewelry business going. I am shocked and distressed.
I regret not reaching out to her in these years past. Just to tell her how much her kindness, support, generosity & exuberance touched me. Perhaps the only true connection in the general blur of high school. How aweinspiring she had been, how I wished to emulate her in school! Would it have made a difference to her decision?
No comments:
Post a Comment